April 8, 2002

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    So I’m driving into work this morning completely oblivious to the fact that I’m an hour late because of daylight savings time and perhaps feeling a bit more responsible than usual because I actually thought I left 30 min earlier because of this RAIN! I think the correct Texas term is ‘like a cow pissing on a flat rock’, but it was coming down. I hear on the radio that some stupid woman is filing a law suit against Burger King because they fry that veggie burger on the same grill as the rest of the meat. WHAT!?


     


    Reasons she needs to have her tubes tied:


     



    1. I’m a vegetarian and I go to Burger King…evidently the health-food-hangout of the new century.

     



    1. I order a veggie-burger at a fast food restaurant…to me this is like making an appointment with your dentist to have your cataracts removed.

     



    1. When the restaurant agrees to offer to *microwave* said tofu/soy hunk for me the ever-valued but still shallow-pocketed customer, that’s not enough. ‘Vegetarians have the right to blah, blah’

    *[mentally thumbing through the Constitution] no they don’t you waste of oxygen.


     



    1. I’m not a real vegetarian because all the REAL vegetarians are actually, oh I dunno, what’s the word I’m looking for…how about a phrase like…know what the hell they are doing and if they are really that serious about it they’ll make their own damn meals thank-you-very-much or show up at a salad bar. I think a few REAL Vegans need to put a burlap sack over my head, drag me out into the alley and beat the crap out of me with a tire iron for embarrassing the family.

     



    1. I desperately need to be sued for embarrassing the human race in general, and if I DO have any offspring, the aliens passing through our solar system may just think this is the last straw (on top of the Jerry Springer trailer park pedophiles, the lose weight, look younger, cook faster, live better infomercials, Holy War live broadcasts) and stroll out to the asteroid belt and send a Vermont-sized asteroid our way just to remind us how petty we really are just before we are all vaporized.

     


     


    Feel free to add your own..mine seem to be getting longer with each entry…

Comments (6)

  • i would gladly be the vegetarian holding the burlap sack.  kudos to bk for even offering a veggie burger.  it really sucks to be stuck at a mcdonalds and eating a mcsalad and fries. 

  • I know that's right..and I understand being stuck at mackdoogles and not wanting a 'salad shaker' [shudder], or in this case BK and not wanting a 'lettuce-croissant with tomato'...and to be disappointed that it's cooked on the grill with the meat, sure! That's understandable; but after that, just DON'T go there anymore. But to file on them, that takes a special kind of idot..one that actually insists that BK, or DQ, or MickD's, or WhataCardiac, Taco hell, Pizza Slut be thier 'go-to' hookup for the Vegan thang...sad.

  • yep. my friend told me that there are meat products in pizza hut's tomato sauce... even for the veggie pizza!!

  • Hehe, like we'd ever really expect Pizza Hut to carry TWO different caches of precious sauce on hand just because the word 'veggie' is in the name of the one pizza that has no pepperoni on it...that's like expecting KFC to carry butter AND margarine.

  • actually, pizza hut is fine.  there is the rumour, but appartently that is all it is.

    and why is she still going to bk anyways?  the old veggie burger was much better.

  • well 'incidental' meat and meat that was in it on purpose but not advertised are two different things... unless of course it is for relgious reasons.  then you are going to hell either way.

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